Today, as I attend a funeral, I am reminded of a truth we often push aside. Life is short, unpredictable, and profoundly shaped by the people we walk through it with. In leadership and in life, it is easy to become consumed by goals, achievements, and possessions. Bigger houses, nicer cars, higher titles, and greater status can quietly take priority over the relationships that sustain us.
But moments like this force us to pause. They strip everything down to what really matters.
Here is a question that hit me with unexpected weight. Who would carry your casket at your funeral? Not family, because family is often a given. But who outside your family has a deep enough connection with you that they would stand by you even in your final moments? Do you have six people in your life with that level of trust, loyalty, and genuine relationship?
It is a confronting question. Many people do not. Not because they are unworthy of friendship, but because somewhere along the way, priorities drift. Work becomes everything. Status becomes a pursuit. Possessions become markers of progress. And relationships, the very thing that gives life meaning, slowly slide to the background.
As leaders, we talk about influence, culture, communication, and development. But the heart of leadership is relationships. The way we show up for people. The way we invest in them. The way we choose connection over convenience, empathy over ego, presence over performance.
So today serves as a reminder.
Instead of asking, “What am I attaining?” maybe the better question is, “What am I sustaining?”
When your story is done, no one will list your possessions during the eulogy. They will talk about how you made them feel, how you showed up, how you led, how you loved, and how you lived.
Death has a way of putting life into focus. Let it be an invitation, not to dwell in sadness, but to reevaluate.
Who matters most right now?
Who have I not checked on in a while?
What relationships do I need to nurture?
Where have I allowed busyness or ambition to replace connection?
What kind of leader am I becoming through the way I treat people?
At the end of our lives, our real legacy will be written in the hearts of the people we invested in, not in the things we collected.
